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“If your brother sins against you, go, show him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained back your brother.”

Matthew 18:15, WEBUS

Reflection

Jesus has an answer for everything, including how to resolve conflicts. In today’s society, people are so quick to blast their issues with others on social media but that’s nothing new. In Jesus’s time, they may not have had Facebook, Instagram, or TikTok but it was common to publicly shame someone for wronging you. It was the equivalent of taking it straight to social media first. And if they didn’t do that, they typically went to community leaders to complain about the person before the person even knew they had wronged the other. That was the equivalent of filing a court complaint. The problem with both approaches is they feed bad motives.

Instead of trying to resolve the conflict, people used those approaches to promote their personal agendas. It could have been to increase status, erode trust in a business competitor, or something else that would ultimately amount to dishonest gain. Either way, the motives weren’t righteous – they were selfish.

Christ told us to go first to the person because it helps us check our motives. When we have to go to the person who wrongs us first, we have to go with sincere hearts because the other person knows what happened too. Those moments are often harder because there’s no audience to take sides. It’s one on one conflict resolution. But it’s the right way because private correction preserves the reputation of both people and unity in the community. It’s also how God does it. He offers conviction before correction. We need that now more than ever.

Prayer

God, thank you for convicting us privately before you correct us publicly. Thank you for Jesus teaching us how to show that same kind of love to one another. Give us the strength and courage to go to those who have wronged us first and honestly share what we experienced. Then God give us the ears to hear and the heart to receive them so we can talk through our problems and experience true reconciliation. Let our hearts and minds be on one accord as your children. In Christ Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Application Question

Who do you need to go to privately and reconcile with to support Christian unity?